Future Mythologies

A Textual Journey with Maxwell Von Bismarck

Friday, May 16, 2003

I graduate on Monday. The most interesting part is I have five relatives who think that they will be attending, but only have four tickets. I've decided to let them decide how that works out. This is after all, one of the last few events in my life that my parents are allowed to put more important on than I do. At least I think so.

Wednesday, May 14, 2003

Could Cruisin' be a new entry into my top ten singles of all-time? After hearing the Huey Lewis version piped into supermarkets for the past several months, I decided to revisit the Smokey classic. What makes his vocal so great here is its conversational quality. He's at his best when he's at his most effortless. Compare Tracks of My Tears to the showy, less-engaging Tears of a Clown. Actually, I won't, because I refuse to take this track off of repeat. Is there even a melody here, or is it actually a remarkably hummable counterpoint? I've listened to maybe ten times in the past twenty-four hours, and I can't tell yet. And it took me until this evening just to notice the beat! Sample-worthy tambourine shuffle, quietly but surely locking the track to the floor. Glad you're going my way.

Listening to Britney Spears' Boys and I'm a Slave 4 U. Started getting quite kafkaesque visions midway through Slave. Towering, icy castles. Black, anti-human machines. There's no reassurance here, it's cold, cruel precision. This can't be right, can it? I'm going to write it off to lack of proper anti-depressants and re-visit it on warmer day. This isn't what everything sounds like to me, honest. Boys is, of course, the masterpiece here. Not only Britney's best song, but perhaps the best teen pop song in recent memory. Absolutely devastating in its minimalism. Robotic drum claps are overdriven and harsh, propelling the song into the intro. Transluscent keyboards pop in, warble slightly off-tune, and fade away. This is what Prince would've sounded like if he actually knew how to use cheesy synth equipment. Laughs and sighs creep out of the metallic rain. This is Britney's real set of implants. She's never sounded this sexy. The Neptunes take her voice and disembody it from its pubescent Disney overmediation into pure teenage lust, updated for the 21st century. And you can't tell me you saw that bridge coming, because nobody did.

Tuesday, May 13, 2003

Future Mythologies is created today. Hopefully there will be much text to come. Today I've made a resolution to listen carefully to at least thirty minutes a day. Somewhat embarrassing that I read so much and listen so little. Tonight it's Beethoven's Eroica.


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